Tuesday, April 3, 2012

Tortillas de Guzman (the vegan version)

Ok, so this is what I would call a sort-of recipe. My mom grew up on the border of Mexico in a small town called Raymondville, Texas. My great-grandfather, Inocencio, was a garbage man. She lived in a small house with her grandparents, my grandma, all of her cousins and about 10 to 12 illegals at a time. The "garbage man" also brought people over the United States border illegally. My mother, being the eldest, had to roll fresh cigarettes and make about 60 tortillas a day since she was 9 or 10 to feed the illegals in their "bed-and-breakfast". Now don't go calling anybody because my grandparents died a long time ago and the only people still alive are now citizens. Also, my sneaky heritage makes me secretive and sleuthful and I will find you. I fit in small spaces and can catch people easily.  So, for anyone who doubts my mexicanism, there it is. I am practically wet behind the ears.
I believe knowing this background is important because...there is no recipe. My mom made tortillas everyday when I was growing up and measured everything out by hand. She did teach my brothers and I how to make them, though. I have tried to break it down into measurements.



New title: Illegal Tortillas or Tortillas por Alien Inmigrante

4 1/2 cups of flour
2 tsp baking soda
1 tsp salt
2 cups of HOT water (boiling if you can take it)
1/2 cup vegan shortening (I used earth balance shortening for baking)




Mix everything, but the water in a large bowl. I have a kettle (thank the Lord for the British), so I heat up about 3 cups of water to a boil. If you do not have a kettle, you can heat it on the stove or a stove top kettle. Begin to pour the water in about a 1/2 cup at a time, mixing it in with you hands. Yes, your hands. It will be hot, it might burn you if you don't have brown hands like me but do what you can and mix it up slowly. Now here is the tough part....you want the dough to be moist, but not too moist and definitely not too dry. Try to add enough water to where the dough sticks, but not to where you can't take your hands off of it. It will look like this when you are done mixing:


Begin taking small "dough balls" off of the ball and rolling them in your hand. It will be about the size of my palm, you can't see my palm so here is a picture:



Keep in mind I have small hands, however good at manual labor.
Once they are rolled pat them between your hands into small round patties, like so:



At this point, if you are white (or gringo) take out that tortilla press. Do not ask me questions about tortilla presses. I have never seen one and I don't know how they work. My mom never used one and neither did my grandmother. If you are brown like me and never knew that one existed until 5 years ago, take out your flour and rolling pin. Cover your counter in a small pinch of flour and then use another small pinch to wipe over the rolling pin. This will keep the dough from sticking to the surface and the pin. Roll the dough into a flat-as-you-can circle.....or semi-circle or oval. Rolling it into a perfect circle is hard and I still have not completely mastered my mother's skill, but here it is:



Take each flat tortilla that you have rolled and hang it over the bowl. Continue this until all of the patties are flat. Place the patties one at a time on a frying pan on the stove on high. Let it sit on each side for about 30 seconds. Parts of the tortilla will brown and it will begin to get crisp. Place each cooked tortilla on a plate and cover them with a towel so they don't dry out. TAH DAH! You have tortillas fit for a wet-back! You can use these for enchiladas, as your bread or even cut them up and make your own tortilla chips. Happy cooking!

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